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I've just returned from an inclement week in Esquinzo. It is about 90 mins in a transfer from the airport. On the southern tip. Let me commence with a comment from a staff member 'it's not just quiet here. It's dead'. On arrival at the hotel the super tardy receptionist proclaimed two things 'no English' and 'passport now'. I was then provided a single piece of A4 paper which she drew a arrow on to point me to my room. Rooms are basic. Very basic. There was a very pleasing alarm clock type drilling from building work that awoke me daily from 8am. This is if the fact that staircases and upstairs apartments running over your bedroom doesn't get you. There is a wide array of cats running free and on the one morning there was no drilling, cleaning staff awoke me at 8 to reinforce I was leaving that day (8 hours later, they provide you no departure info). There is no WiFi (reception aside). There is no information. At all. (some basic room info in your kitchen in German aside). There are no offered or advertised excursions. At all. In 'esquinzo' there is a stunning beach. There is a small friendly bar (that only sells reheated frozen pizza) a tiny mini mart and that folks is it. No shop(S) . There is a restaurant attached to another hotel who turn you away and close for long periods. The monte del Mar restaurant food is awful with service similar to the reception. Other people talk about 'walking' to the next town 'Jandia'. It is not a town. It is a collection of 4 and 5 star all inclusive hotels which if you don't have one of their bands on your wrist they don't let you in. There is a supermarket. See previous of no cafes, bars etc. It is also a miserable 25 min hike there over mostly wasteland. However, here you can get a taxi (the hotel when I asked to order one, said they had, but didn't). Near 'Jandia' there is a great beach and bar. You need to be fit and able as it's a fair slog down a mountain, but worthwhile. (best just hit Esquinzo beach and follow the beach right). The nearest town with a couple of actual cafes, bars or eateries is Morro Jable. It's €12 in a taxi. Food is available but very average. Unless you want absolute total seclusion with limited access to food, daily noise, grumpy staff and limited views from your room, then please, swerve this place.

Just returned from a fabulous week at Alua Village. Yes, the bedroom and bathroom were a little dated (certainly not 4 star), but the rooms, main building and the outside areas were spotlessly clean. At the end of the day, the bedroom was just for sleeping. We had a fantastic balcony with a great sea view. Yes, the pool could do with some maintenance, but the water was clean and there were plenty of sunbeds. The employees made our holiday special, and customer service was definitely 5 star. The food was amazing. People who say it was repetitive clearly only went for the pizza, chips or pasta. During our stay we had fresh salad every day and dishes that included chicken, beef, pork, rabbit, liver, mussels, clams, prawns, squid, salmon, hake, and an array of locally caught fish etc. There were themes on some evenings. The Italian risotto was delicious. The all inclusive alcohol was great. The daytime entertainment was varied, although the evening entertainment (all in french) wasn't anything special. However, it was great just to sit outside and enjoy an evening G&T. The beach was great, but, as others have said, it's a steep walk up and down and impossible for those with mobility issues. However, once on the beach, there was a great little beach bar, and the sea was very safe for swimming. Would I recommend Alua Village? Absolutely and would go there again. We had a relaxing time and were thoroughly looked after.